Fic: Concerns
19/9/10 11:02 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
neveralarchConcerns (Impression and Runner)
Doctor Who
Rating: G
(I can't find anything objectionable)
Characters: Eight, Jacobi!Master
Wordcount: 1,200ish
Summary: Thoughts in a time of war.
A/N: This is a pair of linked not-drabbles. I wrote the Master one first, but a slightly different version of the Doctor one was previously posted here. Now that I'm posting the Master not-drabble, I thought it would be better to have them together.
Impression
Every once in a while, the Doctor loses sight of the fact that he is fighting in a war that few still hope to survive. Such amnesia seems like it would be difficult to develop, given that he's constantly in the thick of battles, sacrificing another old affectation every day in order to keep going. But, on the other hand, any given day in the War isn't really all that different from the life to which he's become accustomed. Adventures on alien asteroids, dealing with deadly danger; it's practically a hobby for him.
The problem is, it never stops. He can't just have an adventure and then hole up in the TARDIS for a while to recover, venturing out again when the boredom gets too much. He can't take as long as he likes on a problem, the better to come up with a clever solution. He certainly can't trust that he'll still be alive tomorrow.
He can't worry about being impressive.
The Master makes it worse. It's as if there's a signal in the Doctor's brain that activates when the Master is around, one that makes him make stupid decisions. He wants the Master be impressed by him, by his brilliance and his clever, yet simple improvisations. It makes him waste time, a precious commodity in this war.
Worse, with the Master there, the Doctor has a lot of trouble truly being in fear for his life. Regeneration and attempted body-theft aside, it really never has quite come to that. It makes him complacent, makes him let little errors slide by that he should have caught. It could cost him his life. It's already cost others theirs.
But the Master's on the Doctor's side, and the enemy now wouldn't think twice about shooting him down without waiting to hear him plead for his life. The Doctor just wishes the Master could have stayed in the opposition. He's not sure how much longer he can deal with this inability to recognize the realities of war.
And then the Master is gone, dead, gone, and it is much too late.
The Doctor watches the fires take hold of Gallifrey, and wonders if the reality was worth it.
Runner
This war doesn't suit him. The Master excels at deceit and conniving - the war with the Daleks offers no opportunity for such extravagancies. If you are a Time Lord, you are an enemy. Your side has already been chosen for you in this war of black and white. No room for double-crossing or playing the inside man. Even if the Master endeavored to hide his true nature, all non-Daleks are executed on sight more often than not.
The only viable strategy is to stand and fight. Admittedly, he's not bad at that, but he's not much good at it either. Real time battle involves quite a bit of improvising and not very much in the way of elaborate plans. The Master's good at elaborate plans, ones with a myriad of moving parts, all heading toward one end. Plans with two men at the center, one as the mastermind and one as the victim.
That's the other problem - the Master, for once, is not in control of even his own actions. Instead, he is at the disposal of the High Council, the same as every Time Lord alive, and quite a few, like himself, who didn't used to be. He's not used to working with equals, and he doesn't appreciate being told what to do. But he's not trusted enough for command.
It's all much more suited for the Doctor. The Doctor is an old hand at the level of improvisation required for success on the battlefield. The Doctor is used to fighting under his own name, rather than an alias, or, at least, rather than a temporary alias. And if the Doctor shares the Master's resistance to following orders, his deviations are more often praised than vilified. He is also, given his current connections in the High Council, considered, a reasonably good, if not reliable, commander.
Well. This war doesn't suit the Master, and he'd leave if there was some corner of the galaxy where he could safely hide. Unfortunately, there isn't. All of the reasons why operating covertly under Gallifreyan auspices is dangerous also apply to operating as a renegade, and the Daleks are everywhere.
Instead the Master stays on Gallifrey, strategizing under Braxiatel's direction and trying to restrain his impulse to do something mad and doomed. Every time one of his carefully-constructed plans is ruined by some hasty order from the field, the Master feels an engulfing urge to take to the battle, to ensure his designs are carried out properly. Every time, he stops himself. He would only be killed, and for nothing.
---
The Master was always good at changing himself to fit the situation. It's something he prides himself on, one of the qualities he developed early on in his life and has sought to carry over from body to body. Compared to the Doctor, he was always the one who fit in, who functioned within the environment rather than without. When he stood out, it was because he wanted to, not because he stood out merely as a function of his being.
This war has strained that ability. Unable to act in his accustomed manner, forced into a service that he finds disagreeable and difficult, the Master stands out simply because of how awkward the fit is. Try as he might, he cannot seem to wedge himself into this limited role.
The Doctor, on the other hand, adapts. He changes his clothing, cuts his hair, installs weapons into his TARDIS. The Master had always thought him more stubborn than that, and it's a relief and a disappointment when he finds out what this Doctor is willing to do to fight and survive.
They don't talk to each other. The Master isn't sure what the other is thinking, but he doesn't want the Doctor to find out how very scared and useless he is. His self-image is far too dependent on the Doctor's thoughts, and he knows that if he was revealed as a failure even in his presumed element there would be nothing left of him. Instead he watches from across the room when the Doctor stops by to speak with Romana, and then later, after Romana is killed, when he drops in to shout at Rassilon. He watches as the fight, both against the Daleks and against Rassilon's self-serving tendencies, turns into a losing battle.
Everything's mad and doomed by then, so there's no reason for the Master to avoid following his impulses. He volunteers for a berth on the Cruciform in the last defense of the Gallifreyan homeworld.
It doesn't matter that they'll all die. What matters is that the Cruciform is equipped with a chameleon arch and a miniature vortex, and the Master's finally figured out what sort of disguise he needs.
This war doesn't suit him, but, given time, he can create one that does.
Doctor Who
Rating: G
(I can't find anything objectionable)
Characters: Eight, Jacobi!Master
Wordcount: 1,200ish
Summary: Thoughts in a time of war.
A/N: This is a pair of linked not-drabbles. I wrote the Master one first, but a slightly different version of the Doctor one was previously posted here. Now that I'm posting the Master not-drabble, I thought it would be better to have them together.
Impression
Every once in a while, the Doctor loses sight of the fact that he is fighting in a war that few still hope to survive. Such amnesia seems like it would be difficult to develop, given that he's constantly in the thick of battles, sacrificing another old affectation every day in order to keep going. But, on the other hand, any given day in the War isn't really all that different from the life to which he's become accustomed. Adventures on alien asteroids, dealing with deadly danger; it's practically a hobby for him.
The problem is, it never stops. He can't just have an adventure and then hole up in the TARDIS for a while to recover, venturing out again when the boredom gets too much. He can't take as long as he likes on a problem, the better to come up with a clever solution. He certainly can't trust that he'll still be alive tomorrow.
He can't worry about being impressive.
The Master makes it worse. It's as if there's a signal in the Doctor's brain that activates when the Master is around, one that makes him make stupid decisions. He wants the Master be impressed by him, by his brilliance and his clever, yet simple improvisations. It makes him waste time, a precious commodity in this war.
Worse, with the Master there, the Doctor has a lot of trouble truly being in fear for his life. Regeneration and attempted body-theft aside, it really never has quite come to that. It makes him complacent, makes him let little errors slide by that he should have caught. It could cost him his life. It's already cost others theirs.
But the Master's on the Doctor's side, and the enemy now wouldn't think twice about shooting him down without waiting to hear him plead for his life. The Doctor just wishes the Master could have stayed in the opposition. He's not sure how much longer he can deal with this inability to recognize the realities of war.
And then the Master is gone, dead, gone, and it is much too late.
The Doctor watches the fires take hold of Gallifrey, and wonders if the reality was worth it.
Runner
This war doesn't suit him. The Master excels at deceit and conniving - the war with the Daleks offers no opportunity for such extravagancies. If you are a Time Lord, you are an enemy. Your side has already been chosen for you in this war of black and white. No room for double-crossing or playing the inside man. Even if the Master endeavored to hide his true nature, all non-Daleks are executed on sight more often than not.
The only viable strategy is to stand and fight. Admittedly, he's not bad at that, but he's not much good at it either. Real time battle involves quite a bit of improvising and not very much in the way of elaborate plans. The Master's good at elaborate plans, ones with a myriad of moving parts, all heading toward one end. Plans with two men at the center, one as the mastermind and one as the victim.
That's the other problem - the Master, for once, is not in control of even his own actions. Instead, he is at the disposal of the High Council, the same as every Time Lord alive, and quite a few, like himself, who didn't used to be. He's not used to working with equals, and he doesn't appreciate being told what to do. But he's not trusted enough for command.
It's all much more suited for the Doctor. The Doctor is an old hand at the level of improvisation required for success on the battlefield. The Doctor is used to fighting under his own name, rather than an alias, or, at least, rather than a temporary alias. And if the Doctor shares the Master's resistance to following orders, his deviations are more often praised than vilified. He is also, given his current connections in the High Council, considered, a reasonably good, if not reliable, commander.
Well. This war doesn't suit the Master, and he'd leave if there was some corner of the galaxy where he could safely hide. Unfortunately, there isn't. All of the reasons why operating covertly under Gallifreyan auspices is dangerous also apply to operating as a renegade, and the Daleks are everywhere.
Instead the Master stays on Gallifrey, strategizing under Braxiatel's direction and trying to restrain his impulse to do something mad and doomed. Every time one of his carefully-constructed plans is ruined by some hasty order from the field, the Master feels an engulfing urge to take to the battle, to ensure his designs are carried out properly. Every time, he stops himself. He would only be killed, and for nothing.
---
The Master was always good at changing himself to fit the situation. It's something he prides himself on, one of the qualities he developed early on in his life and has sought to carry over from body to body. Compared to the Doctor, he was always the one who fit in, who functioned within the environment rather than without. When he stood out, it was because he wanted to, not because he stood out merely as a function of his being.
This war has strained that ability. Unable to act in his accustomed manner, forced into a service that he finds disagreeable and difficult, the Master stands out simply because of how awkward the fit is. Try as he might, he cannot seem to wedge himself into this limited role.
The Doctor, on the other hand, adapts. He changes his clothing, cuts his hair, installs weapons into his TARDIS. The Master had always thought him more stubborn than that, and it's a relief and a disappointment when he finds out what this Doctor is willing to do to fight and survive.
They don't talk to each other. The Master isn't sure what the other is thinking, but he doesn't want the Doctor to find out how very scared and useless he is. His self-image is far too dependent on the Doctor's thoughts, and he knows that if he was revealed as a failure even in his presumed element there would be nothing left of him. Instead he watches from across the room when the Doctor stops by to speak with Romana, and then later, after Romana is killed, when he drops in to shout at Rassilon. He watches as the fight, both against the Daleks and against Rassilon's self-serving tendencies, turns into a losing battle.
Everything's mad and doomed by then, so there's no reason for the Master to avoid following his impulses. He volunteers for a berth on the Cruciform in the last defense of the Gallifreyan homeworld.
It doesn't matter that they'll all die. What matters is that the Cruciform is equipped with a chameleon arch and a miniature vortex, and the Master's finally figured out what sort of disguise he needs.
This war doesn't suit him, but, given time, he can create one that does.
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no subject
Date: 2010-09-20 06:37 am (UTC)I love this idea. It's so very Doctor-ish. <3
I also love the idea that they're both so preoccupied with how they look that it's impossible for them to really see each other.
no subject
Date: 2010-09-20 01:36 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-09-20 12:57 pm (UTC)because really i like these very much. i like that they're unaired concerns, and that actually if either of them talked to the other things might be better (too bad they both suck - similar ways, too, given their similar concerns). and the very quick, but sad mention that romana is no longer president.
no subject
Date: 2010-09-20 01:42 pm (UTC)I think there's this loop people get stuck into, where talking would make things better, but you think it would make things worse, so you just don't. And then I guess your planet is erased from time etc, so it doesn't matter anymore.
no subject
Date: 2010-09-20 02:18 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-09-21 04:10 am (UTC)Yeah, the Time War was kind of a bad time all around, if you buy this characterization.
no subject
Date: 2010-09-21 01:58 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-09-21 04:12 am (UTC)Thanks for reading!