Fic repost: One Life at a Time
26/11/10 12:41 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
neveralarchThere are new things coming, yes, but for today I have another fic repost.
One Life at a Time
Doctor Who
Rating: PG-13
(kissing)
Characters: Delgado!Master/Ainley!Master
Wordcount: 500ish
Summary: Meetings with future selves: often unnerving.
A/N: Originally posted here. Part III of the unanoning mission!
It's not the kiss that surprises him. The Master knows himself, and he knows that he leans toward the hedonistic when it's not inconvenient. He's only met himself twice before, and both times the heady pleasure of feeling paradox tingle across his skin had been too much to resist. He is always undeniably handsome as well, which helps.
The kiss was expected. The different body temperature was not. Now that he's paying attention, his other self's very skin seems off somehow, wrong. The Master pulls away from himself, confused.
"What happened to us?" He has never worried about 'spoilers,' unlike the Doctor. Knowing is much more important than keeping his timeline pure.
"We survived," says his other self. He holds on to the Master's shoulders with almost bruising force, as if he's worried that the Master will pull away, that he will be rejected.
The Master has never managed that amount of self-loathing. Perhaps that is one more thing that will change, in time.
Now, however, he accepts himself. The Master reaches up and cups his older self's cheek, feeling the familiar yet strange bristle.
"We still have a beard, at least," he says. "Chameleon arch?"
"No, it's not our body." His older self relaxes a little, and his hands loosen around the Master's shoulders. "If you want to know what lies beyond your last regeneration, take a good look." He grins, a humorless, slanted pull of the lips that bares his teeth. "I am the afterlife."
"Really?" says the Master, mildly. He moves his hand higher to twine in his older self's hair. It's a stretch, but his older self helpfully bends down a little, making it more convenient. "I had assumed that you were merely my next regeneration."
"No." The grin has real amusement in it now. "You won't want to meet him. You know what they say about thirteenth incarnations."
The Master starts to ask another question and his older self stops him, kissing him again. There's something desperate about it, and the Master tries his best to accommodate himself, even as he tastes blood.
When they finally pull apart, it is his older self that speaks.
"What is it like? Being purely Gallifreyan. I can't remember, not anymore."
"I don't know what you mean," says the Master, but something in his older self's eyes makes him try to explain anyway. "It's normal. What we're used to?" Still not right. He tries one more time. "I feel comfortable in myself."
His older self's breath hisses through his teeth, and the Master knows that that wasn't enough. Unfortunately, he doesn't have anything left to give.
"It can't be that bad," he tries. "We're alive."
"That's the most important thing," says his older self, almost automatically. "But I do," he continues, slowly, "I do miss being comfortable."
The Master frowns. "Better to be uncomfortable than dead, I would think."
His older self laughs. "You're so young," he says. "But you're right, of course." He shakes his head free of the Master's hand and straightens up. The Master looks up at him, watching as his older self disguises his self-doubt and unease with another slanted grin, and stops wondering. He'll get to live through it, after all.
One Life at a Time
Doctor Who
Rating: PG-13
(kissing)
Characters: Delgado!Master/Ainley!Master
Wordcount: 500ish
Summary: Meetings with future selves: often unnerving.
A/N: Originally posted here. Part III of the unanoning mission!
It's not the kiss that surprises him. The Master knows himself, and he knows that he leans toward the hedonistic when it's not inconvenient. He's only met himself twice before, and both times the heady pleasure of feeling paradox tingle across his skin had been too much to resist. He is always undeniably handsome as well, which helps.
The kiss was expected. The different body temperature was not. Now that he's paying attention, his other self's very skin seems off somehow, wrong. The Master pulls away from himself, confused.
"What happened to us?" He has never worried about 'spoilers,' unlike the Doctor. Knowing is much more important than keeping his timeline pure.
"We survived," says his other self. He holds on to the Master's shoulders with almost bruising force, as if he's worried that the Master will pull away, that he will be rejected.
The Master has never managed that amount of self-loathing. Perhaps that is one more thing that will change, in time.
Now, however, he accepts himself. The Master reaches up and cups his older self's cheek, feeling the familiar yet strange bristle.
"We still have a beard, at least," he says. "Chameleon arch?"
"No, it's not our body." His older self relaxes a little, and his hands loosen around the Master's shoulders. "If you want to know what lies beyond your last regeneration, take a good look." He grins, a humorless, slanted pull of the lips that bares his teeth. "I am the afterlife."
"Really?" says the Master, mildly. He moves his hand higher to twine in his older self's hair. It's a stretch, but his older self helpfully bends down a little, making it more convenient. "I had assumed that you were merely my next regeneration."
"No." The grin has real amusement in it now. "You won't want to meet him. You know what they say about thirteenth incarnations."
The Master starts to ask another question and his older self stops him, kissing him again. There's something desperate about it, and the Master tries his best to accommodate himself, even as he tastes blood.
When they finally pull apart, it is his older self that speaks.
"What is it like? Being purely Gallifreyan. I can't remember, not anymore."
"I don't know what you mean," says the Master, but something in his older self's eyes makes him try to explain anyway. "It's normal. What we're used to?" Still not right. He tries one more time. "I feel comfortable in myself."
His older self's breath hisses through his teeth, and the Master knows that that wasn't enough. Unfortunately, he doesn't have anything left to give.
"It can't be that bad," he tries. "We're alive."
"That's the most important thing," says his older self, almost automatically. "But I do," he continues, slowly, "I do miss being comfortable."
The Master frowns. "Better to be uncomfortable than dead, I would think."
His older self laughs. "You're so young," he says. "But you're right, of course." He shakes his head free of the Master's hand and straightens up. The Master looks up at him, watching as his older self disguises his self-doubt and unease with another slanted grin, and stops wondering. He'll get to live through it, after all.
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no subject
Date: 2010-12-14 05:16 am (UTC)""What happened to us?" He has never worried about 'spoilers,' unlike the Doctor. Knowing is much more important than keeping his timeline pure.
"We survived," says his other self."
Nice.
no subject
Date: 2010-12-14 03:11 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-12-18 03:30 am (UTC)Christ, but that is exceptionally chilling.
The whole ficlet is, really --- chilling mixed with such a piteous sadness, like talking to a psychotic who's desperately trying to hold it together enough to function sufficiently to keep from scaring people so much they call the cops (aka the burn-outs who hung out outside my office and the building next door until I put up signs I doubt they could actually comprehend in their states). Excellent job!
no subject
Date: 2010-12-18 03:31 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-12-19 04:19 am (UTC)